You guys,
George bit me.
Like, really fucking hard. Kid broke skin.
When it happened I screamed. It was so unexpected and I was too preoccupied trying to carry him from the bathtub to the bedroom that I didn’t realize he was clamping down on my arm.
My scream scared him. He stopped biting. He stopped screaming. He just stared at me.
When I laid him down naked and clean on the towel he went right back to crying and squirming and tantruming.
I thought I would have been more angry but I wasn’t. I told him it was okay. He was clearly upset. I didn’t know why he was so upset. I rarely do.
Maybe it was because he pooped through his clothes onto his carseat and Sam carried him in the house in a slight panic, asking for help. Maybe it was because he was hungry, and rather than sit down to eat we had to wrestle his wet, brown clothes off him and wipe him down with 32 wipes. Maybe it was because he hates when we dump water on his head. Maybe it was because he had a great day at daycare and as soon as he gets home he’s tired and cranky and that’s just the George we’re going to get at that time of the day. Or maybe it was something else.
I wish he could tell me what he was thinking and feeling. But even if my 20-month-old could speak I don’t know if he would know what to say.
Sometimes I have anxiety. I feel pain in my neck and can’t catch my breath. When Sam asks me what’s wrong I feel even more anxiety because I don’t know why I’m feeling that way. And I’m 37 years old.
Communicating is hard. For all ages. Sometimes we’re just having a moment.
A Thread
Last week my tweet thread went viral:
I gained 1,000 followers on Twitter and over 200 subscribers to my newsletter. Exciting!! I never could have predicted it.
Yesterday I turned another essay into a thread. It was just as fun to write and got almost as much engagement:
Bleecker Bombs
Episode 8 is out!
Sam and I discuss the mindfuck that is sleep training Layla. Then I admit to my most recent meltdown. It’s fine. I’m fine.
Listen to the episode on Spotify, overcast.fm, Google Podcasts, or Apple Podcasts.
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Until next week,
Charlie