You guys,
I’m going to have a baby girl in one month and haven’t given her much thought.
I’ve been thinking about George. How is he going to handle all this? Will it be hard for him? Will I get to spend as much time with him?
My love for George grows every single day. At least once a night I stare at him sleeping on his monitor and announce to Sam, “God he’s cute.”
How could I possibly love another child as much as I love George?
My girlfriend just had her second baby and told me, “Your focus as mama definitely turns to the baby.” She said her 2-year-old son is kind of an afterthought.
I can’t imagine George as an afterthought when he’s currently our whole world.
Sam, on the other hand, is already in love with Baby Girl. He talks to my belly frequently. He wonders what she’ll be like. He can’t wait to meet her.
When George was born I didn’t have that instantaneous love that I heard about and hoped for. I remember looking at him thinking, “Who are you?”
I guess I thought I’d see myself in him. But I saw this strange, tiny baby instead. I wanted to protect him and love him but there wasn’t some kind of intense bond that developed when I gave birth. It took weeks to fall in love with my son.
Maybe that’s how it will happen with Baby Girl, too.
Essay of the Week
My online writing friend, Amit, is about to have his first baby. He asked me, “What advice do you have for first-time parents?”
I answered his question with this week’s essay.
Bleecker Bombs
Sam and I started a podcast and Episode 1 is out! It’s called Bleecker Bombs (h/t Matt Tillotson and Florian Maganza).
In our debut episode, we discuss an unresolved argument in which I reacted insecurely and unfairly to Sam. Just another day in the life! We then share what we learned about parenting, as well as our recent struggle: getting George to swallow food.
You can listen to the episode on Spotify, overcast.fm, Google Podcasts, or Apple Podcasts.
If you enjoy it, please subscribe! Episode 2 will be released Thursday.
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Until next week,
Charlie