You guys,
Our 2-year-old slept in our bed for the first time.
Before I became a parent, the image I had of bringing my child into our bed was a cozy, snuggly, happy one. It looked like a Christmas card.
This was not that.
George had already been sick for two weeks and tonight the cries coming from his room had reached a new pitch. All he wanted was to be held.
Sam and I, exhausted, agreed to let him sleep in our bed. I brought George into our room and tried to get him excited about the idea. “Look, Billy’s here!”
Billy is a stuffed dog George sleeps with sometimes. I feared him becoming too attached to one “lovey” because being attached to one particular stuffed animal could not possibly end well. We would inevitably, surely, lose the thing or accidentally throw it in the trash. So I always made sure to rotate his stuffed animal collection. The result? George did not give two f’s about Billy being in our bed.
Then I asked, with a little too much eagerness in my voice, “Do you want to sleep in our bed tonight?”
“No.”
Ah, yes, classic move, Charlie. Where I ask George a question that I expect an answer to and he gives me the opposite response.
I tried a different question. “Do you want to sleep in your crib?”
“No.”
I looked at Sam. “He’s all yours.”
Sam managed to get George in bed but George refused to lay down. He sat on Sam’s hips as Sam tried to coax him into a lying position. George was much too alert for 10pm. Usually he passes out by 8pm but tonight he was wired.
Sam remembered the school offered cupcakes and cookies at snacktime that day. Was this all stemming from a sugar overload?? We didn’t want to be THOSE parents who tell the school, “Our kid doesn’t eat a lot of sweets, soooo, can you not?” We picked George up from school and his mouth was covered in green icing. Did they really need to serve cupcakes AND cookies?? So great, this was the school’s fault. At least we had someone to blame.
For the next hour, George said a lot of “No’s” as Sam tried to reason with him. At 11pm, Layla’s cries were heard loudly on the baby monitor. I sighed as I realized George was never going to sleep now, but as I threw off the comforter, I saw he was out cold.
25 minutes later, Layla was back to sleep and I was back in our room.
George slumbered peacefully, the bottom half of his body on Sam, the top half conveniently on my side of the bed. I slipped into the sliver of space left for me and tried to sleep, but my brain wouldn’t let me. I worried about both kids waking back up, and eventually did what I often do when trying to sleep, which is think scary thoughts. I don’t know why I do it. It’s like a person who habitually bites their nails. I don’t want to think about murder and break-ins and recount every episode of true crime I regret watching, but it happens, anyway.
The only reason I know I fell asleep was because I was jolted awake frequently by George flailing and saying “No” for whatever reason. Then I heard Sam, “George, did you poop?”
Silence.
“GEORGE… DID YOU POOP???”
And Sam waking up George to change his diaper while I lay there half asleep.
The next morning Sam and I recalled the night before. I laughed about George pooping and Sam said, “You were awake and you didn’t help?”
What was I supposed to do? Help you change his diaper??
We took both babies to the pediatrician. George’s antibiotic wasn’t working (ya think?) so we needed to start him on a new one, and Layla had a double ear infection.
That night, I may have imagined it, but George happily reached for his crib at bedtime. And Sam and I eagerly climbed into our bed, kid free.
Maybe when George gets older and has a nightmare he’ll be more inclined to snuggle with us. Until then, no more sleepovers.
Merry Christmas!
It’s a Bleecker Bombs Christmas Special!!!
Sam and I talk about Santa Claus, gift-giving, exclamation points, Christmas movies, and where we are on our journey with drinking alcohol. I also sing (rap?) a Christmas carol. It’s lit.
Listen to the episode on Spotify, overcast.fm, or Apple Podcasts.
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Have a wonderful holiday, you guys!!!,
Charlie
we bought a backup loey off ebay to ensure that when the first one drops, we got reinforcements
Reading your story makes me wonder how my niece and her husband are going to handle being parents. They just had their first baby in October and she's a delight. Merry Christmas to you and your family.