You guys,
There’s way too much to do.
Most of my time is occupied by George so whenever he’s sleeping it’s a mad dash for productivity. Because if I’m not being productive I feel like my life is wasting away.
Every day I feel a bit of panic because I haven’t done enough. But to what end?
I’ve been struggling to find the balance between work, family, relationships, and self-care.
Should I call my best friend or work on my essay? Should I listen to that podcast or sit and have a conversation with Sam? Should I give all my attention to George or put him in his bouncer so I can do laundry and check household chores off my list? Should I work out or go on Twitter?
Lately I feel like I’ve been choosing the wrong adventure.
My friend Bryce likes to think of things as seasons and burners. She told me, “Right now, for you, this is a season of parenthood. About getting those mama sea legs. About flexing your parenting muscles and your partnership muscles. So everything else needs to be more [on the] back burner.”
George and Sam need to be on my front burners.
I want to enjoy these early days of George’s life. Sometimes he makes eye contact with me and slowly blinks in the most flirty, adorable way. Then he makes a “Geeeee” sound and I don’t know what to do with all the love that fills up inside of me. I don’t want to miss a single moment.
And Sam is my person. I can’t imagine this life without him and can’t lose sight of how important it is to put in the work every day for our relationship.
And yet I’m constantly worrying about what I need to do in the next hour, in the next minute. This need to be productive does not bring happiness. When I think of it this way, it should be easy to choose how I spend my time.
So my goal for this month is to fully embrace being a mom and wife. I want to be present and enjoy this season. Because parenting with Sam is my favorite time of year.
Blog of the Week
I wrote a letter to my younger self.
It was inspired by last week’s episode of The Bachelorette.
The dates on that show are usually pretty lame - at least the conversation is - but leading up to this date, Clare and Jason wrote a letter to their younger selves. It actually sparked an authentic and vulnerable conversation, if you can believe that!
So I pictured myself at 25 - where I was living and how I was feeling. And I really imagined what it would feel like to receive a letter from my future self.
This is a fun assignment. I challenge you, fellow readers, to write a letter to your younger self in under 500 words.
Air Hugs!
I met my first internet friend in real life!
Julia was living in Papua New Guinea when we met during an online writing course in June. Thanks to Twitter, I saw that she was stopping in North Carolina before moving to Canada, so I direct-messaged her and we scheduled a meet-up to walk on the beach.
My new internet friends know me better than people who have been in my life for years because we all have one thing in common: we value personal growth. It creates common ground that makes it easy and inviting to open up and be our true selves.
I can’t wait to meet all of you.
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Until next week,
Charlie
Charlie, it would be so great to meet you in person someday! You radiate such positive energy on the screen, and I am sure that it would be more powerful in person.