38 Comments
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Alexandra Allen's avatar

“I was lost for words, but I’ve been talking about it ever since.”

Love this.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thanks, Alexandra!

Clayton Dorge's avatar

so good, Charlie. "I was lost for words, but I’ve been talking about it ever since." <-- sums up all the best books and experiences.

Emma Dorge's avatar

Okay! Came to the comments to leave you this EXACT comment. Maybe I should marry that guy! But seriously-- 👏

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Haha thank you both so much!!

Cissy Hu's avatar

I came here to leave the exact comment too 🥹

Michael Dean's avatar

Thoughts and feelings are stronger when they're invisible.

Charlie helped me realize that they should live in the subtext whenever possible. The act of compressing a complex emotion into a single word ("crazy") strips it of its power. Instead, write in images. By showing 2 or more images, the thoughts and feelings emerge between them.

(from The Glass Castle)

“When I was seven months old my father threw my mother on their bed and tried to suffocate her with a pillow. She broke free. Two weeks later he did it again. She broke free again, but this time he chased her and cornered her in the bathroom with his straight razor."

This gives me a visceral experience of anger and craziness without being labeled. I'm plunged into the source behind language.

Next time I edit, I'm going to highlight thoughts and feelings in red. Instead of deleting them, I'll look for two images that can provoke an invisible version of that emotion. Thanks for the idea Charlie.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

I'm curious how this goes... if it's easy or difficult, or in what instances it would be easy or difficult.

Something I learned from the memoir I just finished (What Remains by Carole Radziwill): simply writing the shocking thing without trying to describe it is way more compelling than trying to describe the shocking thing.

Charlie Becker's avatar

Wow this is super eye-opening given me a lot to think about. I usually love the internal monologue of characters when I'm reading, but I don't think before your examples I had ever noticed how much taking out all of the thoughts and feelings does to improve the pacing.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Right?! I didn't even think about the pacing but that's a great point.

Tommy Dixon's avatar

🤌 *chefs kiss*

Cris Valerio's avatar

I love how this turned out. I also am so thankful for the lesson 👏🏽

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thanks, Cris! And thanks for all your feedback on the first draft.

Medha Murtagh's avatar

Wow. When I read 'she did not write thoughts or feelings' my first thought was 'well that must be a bit shit'. I'm a massive fan of thoughts and feelings. But when you explained it... wow.

This essay may just have revolutionised my writing.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Haha Medha! Yes! This comment made me so excited. Please let me know how it goes.

Medha Murtagh's avatar

I write with drawings, so it's not the standard kind of writing as stand alone thing. I'll have to see how it unfolds. And no probs. I'll touch base about it again as I explore it. Thanks again for the great post.

Cissy Hu's avatar

absolutely love where this piece landed, Charlie :) thanks for a beautiful lesson on writing words that leave our readers lost for words!

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thank you, Cissy! Love the way you phrased that.

Ororo Munroe's avatar

Ok, after that the description of that book, I Googled The Glass Castle. And noticed that it was made into a movie with Woody Harrleson as Jeannette's father. I vaguely remember seeing the trailer for that. I couldn't imagine living a life like that. Petting a cheetah! And then telling his children to try it? O_O Lordt. Utterly. Crazy. Just reading that passage about Billy had me tensing up. Reading that book must've been like riding a roller coaster. Gah!

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Lol Ororo, it was!!

Becky Isjwara's avatar

SUCH a good tip that I still struggle to implement in my writing. Thanks for sharing them here and during your sessions, Charlie.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thank you, Becky. I still struggle, too!

Jack Dixon's avatar

Since you first introduced this idea in a deep dive, which you summarized wonderfully below, I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately in my own writing.

“She did not write thoughts or feelings. 

All she wrote was dialogue and action. Without anyone’s thoughts or feelings it was like I was experiencing what Jeannette had experienced...”

A great read. Thanks for your writing Charlie!

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thank you so much, Jack! I'm glad the idea resonated.

Anna Archakova's avatar

Charlie! This is GOLDEN. You've just articulated the whole "show-don't-tell" philosophy in a 5 min essay rooted in your own passion for writing. They spend 4 years distilling the same concept in film schools lol 😅. This text is not just a beautiful inspection of these writers; it's a true Charlie Bleecker style manifesto. The last lines took my breath away, thank you for this gem 🫶

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Anna, wow, thank you so much. It's amazing how something we all know can continue to be broken down so that we can not only understand the principles, but have specific tools to make it happen.

Anna Archakova's avatar

Yes! Your tools are outstandingly colorful though, I'm preordering your book already ahaha

Camilo Moreno-Salamanca's avatar

This has been bookmarked. I think about this writing advice (and your writing advice from all the breakouts) every day. Such a solid piece (yet again).

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thank you, Camilo!

Rick Lewis's avatar

Thanks for being an ambassador for this message Charlie about writing only what is seen and heard. It's slowly sinking in. : )

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Takes a while, right? For me, too.

Rob Tourtelot's avatar

Love this piece. Glass Castle is now next up on the reading list. I'm looking forward to trying out the sportswriter approach with heavier topics. It's such a great antidote to any self-pity or anger that might creep in. I'm curious to know how Jeanette Walls landed on this technique, and wonder if she had earlier drafts that were full of thoughts and feelings.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

"the sportswriter approach with heavier topics" ... I love that! And completely agree that it's a great way to keep out any self-pity or anger. I wondered the same thing about earlier drafts!! It's an interesting thought. I would love to ask her.

James Bailey's avatar

So beautiful and evocative. Like Clayton wrote - the ending was perfect.

Charlie Bleecker's avatar

Thank you, James.