11 Comments
Sep 17Liked by Charlie Bleecker

I love this piece. Forty is when you realize that you're making it up as you go along. You get to decide, as you clearly explore. Here's what I've learned from a few decades further along: Living in your body over time, you grow more aware of cellular sensation. Stress and strain that used to repair itself with a good night's sleep takes a bit longer and you feel it a bit more. When you notice those aches and pains, think: "It's fixing itself." Sure, do the physical therapy and everything else, and know that your cooperative, collaborative cellular life is also making it up as it goes along, fixing itself.

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Hi Alden! Thank you for the note! I like the mantra that the body is fixing itself. That's much more positive than what I was saying to myself.

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Sep 21Liked by Charlie Bleecker

Hi Charlie! Thanks for your reply. I find it mindblowing to imagine the cellular level collaboration and cooperation that goes on to sustain and repair our bodies over a lifetime. Now it seems obvious to me that by appreciating that shared creativity and resilience, as in “It’s fixing itself,” my dear little ego gets to relax and feel included, instead of burdened with driving the whole bus. What a relief.

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Sep 21Liked by Charlie Bleecker

As I read over this exchange, I’m so glad I’m working with an editor for my book. My dear little ego is in boot camp, tasked with learning to distill an idea instead of repeatedly thumping my reader with it. I love the light touch and generous truth in your offerings. Thanks again.

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Haha "my dear little ego is in boot camp" ... totally! Thank you so much, Alden. I'm still learning how to not thump my readers with how to think and feel. It's nice when an editor (ahem, my husband) points it out to me.

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“I have two beautiful, perfect kids who are at ages where they play together and hold hands and make up games on their own like Airplane and Bedtime and I watch from afar as they waddle and discover and maybe this is everything there is.”

Precious. Such great ages!

We went through something similar after our twins and they ended up being the first two, and the final two. And it was perfect. Why? Because that’s how it turned out.

While we other intentions for a while, we let go of the outcome, for it wasn’t completely up to us.

❤️

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Thank you, James. You're right, it's perfect because that's how it turned out. I like to be in control of a lot of things in my life and I learn over and over again how little I have control over. And they are at such great ages! The best so far! It's been so fun, especially watching them play and work through stuff together.

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Sep 17Liked by Charlie Bleecker

There’s a lot here, Charlie. ♥️ my words are cluttered this morning, so instead I’ll say: take care of that knee. We have future tennis adventures in our future.

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Thank you, Emma. I'm working on it and we sure do!!

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Sep 17Liked by Charlie Bleecker

“Their chunky cheeks”. I love my kiddos chunky cheeks 😍😍

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The best, right?! :)

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