Charlie, your use of time in this piece is excellent. 👏🙂.
And I so appreciated this:
The woman leaned forward. “They can touch anything,” she whispered loudly, as if her comment was for me but she wanted the kids to hear, too. “If there’s a button, they can press it.”
I once walked into a sort of antique store with my five or six year olds, telling them not to touch anything. The owner, in the same manner and voice you describe looked at them and said, “you can touch anything you want. And don’t worry if you break something. You’re kids.”
I’ve always remembered that. Let kids be kids. She gave me perspective I’ve used ever since.
Indeed, that is a wonderful aspect of the story. And let's be brutally honest here - a lot of the stuff in antique stores deserves to be broken by kids.
Bahahaha I'm dying! It is not a movie I ever saw, I just chose the picture because it looks like a quintessential movie poster for a Hallmark movie, doesn't it? Now that you mention it, it probably is a good one. I recognized Lucas but not the woman.
My goodness, I just Googled it. It looks like the two of them have been in THREE Hallmark movies together! Write Before Christmas, Best Christmas Party Ever, and Road To Christmas. These are the Hallmark movies we should probably be watching, anyway. My MIL watches all the Hallmark movies every year, and she has been very disappointed by the new ones so far.
I am in love love with the way you wrote this piece. Your ability to tell a story and allow the reader to unravel the mystery of this woman & this interaction is truly spell-binding. We get to find out WITH you what your relationship will be and where your connection will go.
Favorite line-
I told her my biggest fear is looking stupid. She told me her biggest fear is being stupid. It was at this point I became aware that our conversation could be heard by other people in the coffee shop, and I suggested we go back to her house.
Such a great example of writing music. Short short short sentences that parallel each other, and the long sentence breaks the pattern both in the sentence structure AND in the story. You go from strangers in a coffee shop to actual potential friends!
Thank you for your delightful writing and reminding me of the magic of talking to strangers!
Me too, Drake!! I also think I'm much more open to those kinds of moments when I'm with my kids. Being with them makes me more curious and present. When I'm alone I more often than not keep my head down.
Charlie, your use of time in this piece is excellent. 👏🙂.
And I so appreciated this:
The woman leaned forward. “They can touch anything,” she whispered loudly, as if her comment was for me but she wanted the kids to hear, too. “If there’s a button, they can press it.”
I once walked into a sort of antique store with my five or six year olds, telling them not to touch anything. The owner, in the same manner and voice you describe looked at them and said, “you can touch anything you want. And don’t worry if you break something. You’re kids.”
I’ve always remembered that. Let kids be kids. She gave me perspective I’ve used ever since.
Oh my gosh, don't worry if you break something! That lady was really nice haha.
And thank you, James. I played around with the structure a few times. It was fun.
Indeed, that is a wonderful aspect of the story. And let's be brutally honest here - a lot of the stuff in antique stores deserves to be broken by kids.
Everybody wins! Friendship for you and Charly, and a very child-friendly woman for your kiddos 😁
Haha exactly! :)
This piece is pretty much perfect
Aw Libby! Thank you!
Charlie! Charly! Everything James said and more!
I almost skipped this issue as I am editing for WoP and feeling the time crunch. But boy am I glad I gave myself a feast!!
Ahhh thank you Karena! And thank you for taking the time. You must be swamped with essays!
"Swamped" in the best possible way. Such wonderful writing with a bounty of old and new material.
This is so not the point but the photo absolutely got me! Lucas Scott and Nanny Carrie are in a Hallmark movie together?!
Bahahaha I'm dying! It is not a movie I ever saw, I just chose the picture because it looks like a quintessential movie poster for a Hallmark movie, doesn't it? Now that you mention it, it probably is a good one. I recognized Lucas but not the woman.
My goodness, I just Googled it. It looks like the two of them have been in THREE Hallmark movies together! Write Before Christmas, Best Christmas Party Ever, and Road To Christmas. These are the Hallmark movies we should probably be watching, anyway. My MIL watches all the Hallmark movies every year, and she has been very disappointed by the new ones so far.
Charlie!
I am in love love with the way you wrote this piece. Your ability to tell a story and allow the reader to unravel the mystery of this woman & this interaction is truly spell-binding. We get to find out WITH you what your relationship will be and where your connection will go.
Favorite line-
I told her my biggest fear is looking stupid. She told me her biggest fear is being stupid. It was at this point I became aware that our conversation could be heard by other people in the coffee shop, and I suggested we go back to her house.
Such a great example of writing music. Short short short sentences that parallel each other, and the long sentence breaks the pattern both in the sentence structure AND in the story. You go from strangers in a coffee shop to actual potential friends!
Thank you for your delightful writing and reminding me of the magic of talking to strangers!
Oh, thank you so much, Christina!
I’m Charly. I’m Charlie!
You’re a writer? I love writers.
It was meant to be! Love the repetition and rhythm and looking forward to what’s ahead!
Thank you so much, Kelly. It was meant to be! I might have to write a follow-up about Charly. :)
I love the sense of serendipity, but more importantly, being open to the moment when meeting a new person.
I hope that we read in another post about the incredible memoir that you discover from your new friend.
Me too, Drake!! I also think I'm much more open to those kinds of moments when I'm with my kids. Being with them makes me more curious and present. When I'm alone I more often than not keep my head down.
Real life friends!!!
Real life friends!!!
This is just delightful
Haha thank you, Alex!
Appreciating your craft... great story Charlie!